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Thursday, 21 May 2015

In Your Dreams Kid!

I looked down and were my arms should have been, there were these manly, fuzzy arms. I had a mans had the arms of a guy who sits near me at work... HOW DID I HAVE HIS ARMS? "Don't worry, I can help with those," a strange voice swam into my right ear. How? How could anyone help? Then he got out his tweezers.

The rest was a blur because lone behold it was a dream. A very weird dream and the concept was foreign to me on why I had just experienced the swapping of arms with a guy from work. Sure I have had dreams before but this one particularly haunted me and made me contemplate a hot wax! Why do we dream the things we do? I did a little research and came to the conclusion that the process of dreaming occurs 3 to 7 times a night for periods of 5 to 20 minutes a time and during this time we undergo Rapid Eye Movements or REM. But enough about the sciencey guff...I also read that a psychoanalysis of dreams says that they are based on our desires, thoughts and motivations. WELL...the guy who came up with that has clearly never been inside my head...

I have never had an underlying desire to trade arms...nor have I ever willed and wished the hair on my own to grow any more than it has (tried shaving them once as an insecure teenager) I have never thought, "hmmm, what would happen if I had hairy man arms," either. And never have I ever lived my life with the motivation of knowing my end goal will be to have that guy from my office's arms! So no, you can take your psychoanalysis and stick it were the sun don't shine because quite frankly I ain't buying it. I maintain the fact that if someone had my dreams as a hallucinogenic side effect of a drug then that would be a much more fitting place for them...not in my head at night!

"Dare I sleep tonight? What will happen to my other limbs?"

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